An Introverted Extrovert... An Extroverted Introvert, Perhaps?

I posted this question on Twitter, "Can you only be an introvert or an extrovert... not some combination of both?"

However... my mind was still tossing around the possibilities in my head... so much that I thought it best to blog about it and exercise my ability to think about randomness.

I mean... really... are you only an extrovert or an introvert? Can things really be either black or white... so clear cut... one or the other?

I guess for me, the way my mind always has its gears turning about something... it's rarely ever black or white... things tend to be a bit of gray- various tones and hues of grey too! I mean... look... I just spelled the color as both "gray" and "grey"... the two possible ways to spell it. It's very difficult for me to not toss around possibilities... I like this kind of mental freedom... to not be contained by 'this' or 'that'.

... anyway... I see myself straying from the subject at hand. Maybe I can save this whole black and white self-discussion for another entry.

The question I pose to myself (and my readers) is whether or not you can't be a nice mix of both introverted and extroverted. Who is to say people can't establish themsleves as an introverted extrovert... or as an extroverted introvert?

In the past, things were easier for me when it came to defining myself. Right up to some time in my later high school life, I unquestioningly considered myself to be an introvert. I was shy (not that shyness is a qualifying factor of an being an introvert... not all introverts are necessarily shy. There are occasions when they can blossom and shed any shy preconceptions you had of them. Oh man... I'm veering off topic again...). I was shy to the point where I preferred keeping to myself. I was most comfortable when left alone. I had "friends"... but, I considered them to be mostly school acquaintances. I would interact with them only in school. Once I went home, I would rarely... probably even never... have any type of interaction with them (I wouldn't meet them or hang out with them... nor would I talk to them on the phone or have sleepovers and such). I would be with my family at home from 4-ish in the afternoon until 7-ish in the morning of the next day. Actually, even with my own brothers, who would always be doing things with each other, I tended to keep to myself. I can't say I recall perfectly, but I'm almost positive that, even while being a pretty solitary kid, I have always been pretty happy. So, I doubt I ever really felt lonely. I liked the time I had to myself... and would keep myself occupied and entertained doing whatever it is I did.

Then we move onto high school. This is the time I met what I consider to be my first group of actual friends friends. They helped me grow and dispose of most of my shy exterior. I always hung out with them and spent most of my free time with them or, at the very least... interacting with them (whether it be in person or on
the phone/online). By the end of high school, I considered myself to have changed into an extroverted individual. I became loud (sometimes even obnoxiously so), I was very open and would rarely be embarassed (sometimes a bit too open), and really craved attention. I loved being the life of any situation I was in... so, naturally I felt best when in the company of others.

This remained the same for quite some time. In fact, it's only recently that I've began to notice some changes. Well, actually... I think today... right now... marks the first time I consciously ponder as to how I see myself now.

I still have that love for attention and urge to be in the middle of everything... but then there are those times I crave the peace and tranquility that you can only get from solitude. I like being in the company of others... though, there are many people (or types of people) I like to avoid and keep away from. I wish to be doing something with others when I'm alone and bored at home sometimes... yet, I wish to be left alone when in the presence of some the other times.

So, what am I now? An extrovert? An introvert?

You now see a sampling of my thoughts on the matter. I don't think I fit into either category perfectly. I'm not black... nor am I white... there is some definite graying going on here.

How do you guys see it?

I'd like to think of myself as an introverted extrovert... at least at the present moment. An extrovert (I still seek attention and share almost anything with anybody with little embarassment) who needs the occasional moments to be introverted. Whether that be doing my hour walks I do on some nights... a weekend where I'm a bum in my apartment and watch movies/TV... eating lunch and prefer to not engage in conversation... or simply sitting on my toilet (aka... my thinking throne).

There you have it... you can a little bit of both if that's how you see yourself! That's the way it should be... or so I think!